To My Wife: Thank You

Today is my ninth wedding anniversary. Let me tell you, I have a great wife. How many of you guys out there can say that your wife hates shopping and loves football? I can! I won’t say my wife is perfect, because she’s not—neither am I, of course, we’re all human—but I will say that she’s perfect for me.

So, to my wife on our anniversary:

Honey, the last nine years have been great. Sure, we’ve had our ups and our downs. We’ve experienced happiness and joy that we could not contain—the birth of Cameron, or Summer’s wedding, for example. We’ve also suffered heartbreak and sadness; I won’t go into any details because there’s no need—we remember. We’ve faced challenges that we never dreamed we’d face. Together, we’ve made life-changing decisions. And every step of the way, you’ve been there to support me and to support our family. Your loyalty and your dedication have been steadfast and complete. Your love and your compassion have been unwavering. You have strengthened me when my faith was weak, and you have allowed me to minister to you when yours was weak.

As a token of appreciation for your love, your loyalty, and your support, I want to publicly tell you: Thank You. Thank you for being who you are, and thank you for sharing these last nine years with me. Thank you for your tireless efforts on my behalf and on the behalf of our children, even when they don’t recognize or don’t want your support (we do have teenagers, after all). Thank you for being a godly woman. Thank you for loving God and, most especially, for loving me. After the last nine years, I can’t wait for the next ninety years, or however long God blesses me to be with you.

Happy anniversary, sweetheart!

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  1. Keith’s avatar

    Hi Scott,

    What lovely thoughts. Thanks for sharing so openly. If more husbands loved their wives like you love yours, our society would be a lot better off.

    I feel the same way about my bride of 18 years. Christ is also the center of our marriage, and that’s what makes the marriage so great; we’re focused on Him, which means we’re not so self-focused. That’s the key.

    And congratulations!

  2. william bishop’s avatar

    Good work Scott. I also still love my wife(of a bunch of years, I’m a bit fuzzy on how many–maybe 12?).

    A few of my friends envy me, because she is not only practical and down to earth, she’s smart and funny too!

    No religion for us, but I don’t begrudge anyone something they feel helps their marriage.

    Best wishes for the next 50 years!

  3. slowe’s avatar

    Keith, William,

    I appreciate it, guys. Perhaps if men like us can show that loving our wives is a good thing, we can set an example for others in the IT field (and in other industries, too).

    Thanks for reading!

  4. william bishop’s avatar

    I think pretty much every one in the field understands that IT people are not only whipped, but generally have fairly successful marriages. I don’t know why, but the divorce rate amongst my geek friends and myself is probably 25% of what it is among my friends from other walks of life. We’re generally not as hung up on a rather thin “perception” of what a man is supposed to be like. Most don’t have a problem with a “sure honey” vs. “get it yourself woman” that I see elsewhere. Worst marriages? Cowboys! Yes, they’re still around, and they’re the worst I’ve seen. Best? Geeks! Of course there are exceptions, but averaged out, definately.

  5. Crystal’s avatar

    Sweetheart,

    I want to thank you for the beautiful post on your website. You certainly did not have to do that. It does mean a lot to me to know that our marriage and the love we share means so much to you that you want to share it with the world. I feel the same way, as you well know.

    I read your blog, at very least, weekly, but I did not expect to see a post for me! Thank you! I love the relationship we share and am thankful for the gift God has given me in you. You really are the total package and I could not ask for a more godly, more loving, or a more dedicated husband. You are the best husband and father I could ever hope for. Thank you for so many years of absolute commitment to me and to our family.

    I, too, am looking forward to the rest of our lives together! I love you so very much!

    Yours always,
    Crystal

  6. slowe’s avatar

    Crystal,

    You’re welcome, of course! No need to thank me for the truth…

    William,

    My comments regarding men in the IT industry are really more directed toward the behavior that I see from IT pros at these big professional conferences. It’s all about going to the strip joints or trying to get some woman in the sack. Now, if you want to drink a bit while you’re out, that’s up to you. If you’re single and you want to hit a strip joint, that’s up to you, too. But if you’re married, you shouldn’t be going to strip joints and you shouldn’t be out drinking in the hopes of “getting lucky”. At least, that’s my opinion, and we all know opinions are like elbows–everyone has a couple.

  7. william bishop’s avatar

    Ah….I don’t see a lot that. Most of us rarely drink, none of us go to the booby bars….

    As to marriage, I would agree. You make the committment, you stick to it.

  8. Anonymous’s avatar

    Thanks, brightened up my day here! Thoughts went from researching registry links to my soon-to-be wife and put a smile on my face.

    So I’d better agree with William when it comes to his theory about IT people generally have fairly successful marriages! :-)

  9. Vikash Kumar Roy’s avatar

    I am from Alien land and their people think that many Americans does not believe in long lasting marriage (Means people keep getting married twice or many times as they wish). But when I started working with my American college I found it’s not as you think sitting thousand miles away or they way Hollywood movies show you. Some of my American college is married for past 40 years. That is really nice to see and most of them do not smoke or booze. I don’t know how the culture outside IT is but I guess IT folks maintain some kind of discipline in their life which I always like.

    Scott I would like to wish you and your wife a wonderful married life.

    (Sorry for my poor english)

  10. william bishop’s avatar

    Your english is fine. To be honest, most people I know have been married for a long time. Americans are more likely to leave a bad marriage than most nationalities I think, a lesson learned a long time ago(don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater)….and it’s a good lesson. As much as people will complain about the increased divorce rates, I think it better to leave a bad situation and continue hoping and working for a better one, than to end up unhappy in 50 years. I’m lucky, I’ll be able to do 50 years with my wife easily, but a lot of people don’t marry wisely. Better to learn your lesson and move on.

  11. Dave’s avatar

    My wife and I will hit our twentieth in October of this year. It’s tough at times, but it’s worth it. That was awesome to see this posted by you and the reply from your wife as well as the kind words of everyone else.

  12. Vinod Bhandurgey’s avatar

    HI
    Great and lovely thoughts friend, All the Best for you and people you are like minded. Tomorrow is my seventh anniversary

  13. ntho’s avatar

    This is an outanding example , I have been with my wife for 14 years and we ares still crwaling . cant wait for onther 14 or until God do us part.

  14. Dante’s avatar

    Sweet guy:) meri xmas to both of u.

  15. Rajiv Banerjee’s avatar

    Hi Scott!

    I really liked the way you thanked your wife. It is really good to see that we still have people around who think that way. Today is my third anniversary. I am a newbie in this field but it really feels like we can go together a couple of hundred years. Thanks for the post once again.

    Take care both of you!

  16. Huey Brian’s avatar

    Hi. Scott. My name is Brian from Philippines, I am 28 years old and my wifey is 29. I am a newbie also in this field. I tied up with my wifey for 2 years and I feel so blessed and happy now. Though, sometimes feel like bored and missed my friends going out with them but your right, It`s really different if your single and your married. I agree with you that if your married, you must stick to your wife and stay with her. I admired you so much and I wanna be friends with you. and wanna be same as you too. Thank you again for this BLOG and I`ll always take care and treasured my family, my wife forever as what you did to your family and wife. God Bless and Good health!

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